I wasn’t really having much fun that night. I was waiting for a friend who never arrived. I left the club and headed over to a shop. It was 2:00am. The shop was closed and there were two people hanging out on some benches outside. Maki and Diane were there talking. All I know is one is a designer and the other from Germany. I dunno if I’ll ever see them again. I liked talking to strangers. I stole a shot with my phone.
So, I’m plastered. I just got home from the re-opening of Bed in Malate. Oh yeah! I f*ckin rock. I wore my Team Aniston shirt from SFAS. Dood. I’m having my tuna melt on goddamn whole wheat bread with low fat mayo and low fat cheese. Man, I’m fat, but I’m also phat. You got that right. I rock like yo momma gettin’ all high from smoking pole. Oh yeah! I love you guys.
Jay, I love you. Bed rocks. I’m like downin’ tons of vitamin c right now. I gotta make sure I ain’t got no hangover from those mutha f*ckin long islands. Oh hell no!
Okay, I’m heading to my ceramic friend right now. Chill y’all! Peace out.
I’m not sure if this is funny or gross… Hmm…
I probably won’t be updating much this week. I’ll be doing my couch potato sessions, well I’ll actually be in bed watching, but you get picture. I got a bunch of dvds to watch. Yay! I’ll be loggin’ on though ’cause I gotta keep up with my Lj readin’.
Me = No social life
I noticed something about myself that I find kinda weird. As many of you know, I’m quite the chatterbox. I’m also a little tactless, which is due to my North American upbringing or maybe that upbringing bullsh*t is just my excuse. So, here’s the weird part. When I’m surrounded by people, meaning more than like four, I tend to shut up and listen. I become the quiet one in the group. I’m not exactly sure why this happens and I’ve been trying to figure it out for awhile now. I came up with the theory that I’m actually shy. I’m an introvert. Or, at least, I used to be. I dunno.
Back in grade school, I was one of the shy, geeky kids that didn’t really socialize very much. I wasn’t exactly the “loser”. I had enough friends. I hung out with the “cool kids” at times, but I hung out with the “brains” as well. Actually, this “in between” thing always left me somewhere on the outside. Anyway, I’m going totally off-topic. I was in grade 8 when something made me change myself in a big way. For years, I had been doing my projects and presentations on video ‘cause I had the worst stage fright ever. One day, the teacher specifically pointed out that we were to do individual presentations on a sport and we had to speak in front of the class. We had to do this sh*t live. I was shaking in my snow boots from the point when the teacher gave us our assignment to the day of the presentation. Being the nerd that I am, I was well-prepared. I practiced everything that I was to say and I prepared answers for questions that I thought my classmates would bring up. With all that preparation, when the time came to present, I choked. I was a stuttering mess. I sounded like a total dumdum.
When I got back into my seat, I wanted to melt into my seat and disappear from the classroom. I was bitchin’ at myself for being such an idiot. After watching the presentations that came after me, I was telling myself “What the f*ck is wrong with you? You’ve been classmates with these people for years. They’re your friends. They can get up there and speak. Why can’t you?!”
The following year, I ran for junior social rep in high school. I got up onstage in the gymnasium and spoke in front of the entire high school. I was nervous, but I got through it. A few years down the road, I’ve been in musicals, plays, and I host events at school. This carried over to college and even after.
It was a little after college when I noticed something odd about me. I can get up in front of thousands of people to talk, make a fool of myself or whatever, but I’m quiet when I’m in a big group of friends. My theory, which I still believe true, is that I’m shy. I’m still the introvert that I was years ago. I know that it may sound funny to a lot of you, but it makes sense. When I’m in front of all these people, when I sing, act, dance, or just speak in front of them, I’m not myself. It isn’t me. It’s just very good acting. The person that’s up on the stage is someone I created throughout the years to cover the grade eighter that couldn’t speak in front of his classmates. It isn’t really me.
I’m guessing that the real me is still quite shy when placed in front of people. I’m totally chatty when there’s one or two or three. But when there’s more people than that, I just keep quiet.
It’s Sunday, just past 4pm and I just got out of bed. Most people say that when you lack sleep, there’s no way you can get it back. All I can say is… my body sure as heck tries.
I didn’t have enough sleep yesterday ‘cause I had gotten in from Makati at 5am. I fell asleep at about 6am. I had to wake up early that morning too ‘cause it was my grandmother’s birthday and there was a celebration in Pampanga. Usually, I get real good sleep during these celebrations. Usually, I come in to the party, pay my respects to all the elders, then head off to a bedroom or anyplace that looks like a nice quiet area to doze off. Usually, my mother doesn’t make me promise to stay awake during the party ‘cause, apparently, it’s rude to disappear and sleep.
So, there I was awake and trying to hang on to conversations with my cousins, aunts, uncles and all the other types of relatives around you can think of. I really wanted to go to sleep but mommy would get upset. I was struggling to be entertained, which is so sad. I noticed them bring these babies into a bedroom. I took a peek and they were putting the babies to sleep. Why can’t I go to sleep? Why do the babies get to sleep? I wanted to cry and make a ruckus just so they’d allow me to sleep. Babies have all the fun. They get to eat and sleep all day, and everyone just babies them.
Anyway, I decided to leave the party for awhile. I was so severely bored that I had to get out. Luckily, I had a potluck dinner that evening and I was assigned to bring some sweets. I love sweets. Even in Pampanga there are shops I go to buy certain things. I headed to Aurely’s to buy some little brazo de mercedes like cakes and revel bars. After that, I got some leche flan from Joevine and a sansrival cake from this house in this subdivision in Pampanga. My dessert shopping was complete. Next stop was to get some butong pakwan (dried watermelon seeds) to munch on.
I got back to the party just in time to leave. I got some shuteye in the car on the way back to Metro Manila. When I got home, it was a quick jump into the shower and change of outfit. Dinner invites were for 7pm. It was already 6pm and time to go into hyper drive. I got there on time. Thankfully, there was no traffic.
Dinner went great. The food was just awesome. It was really yummy and there was way too much! Everyone was full to the brim, or at least I’d like to think so ‘cause I was. Wonderful house, wonderful food, and wonderful people. *loves it*
The gathering ended at around 1am, then it was off to M Café for the birthday of Jopa, Lola Poma’s Singapore based brother. It was a short stopover at M Café then we all headed to Government. Government was hell. Due to the absence of Bed, Government was like total tightness. I hated it. I tried to get to the dancefloor to find Rocky but hands kept brushing my crotch. I felt so dirrty that I just turned around and exited. I went in once though and danced to Shake It off. The rest of the time, I was just outside or on the benches by my cousin’s shop.